Lesson 9: Relationship

Dear Ladies,

I'm sorry I'm not there with you in person to make these notes a little more reflective of our class discussion, but here are Kim's notes. As you prepare for the upcoming Christmas holiday, I pray that God will prepare your heart to receive His words for you today.

 Blessings!

·      Read through Eph 5:15-6:9 aloud.

·      Pray

·      Key Verse: v. 18 (Have it written on wipe board)          

o   We can’t do any of the following commands in our relationships if we are not “filled with the Spirit” because our sin nature will win out

o   Look at Word studies for “dissipation” and “filled” , write on board

o   What contrast is mentioned in this verse?

§  Being drunk vs. being filled with Spirit

o   Why are these two things being contrasted?

§  Write table on the board…

§     Drunkenness	§     Spirit Filled
§     Lack of concern for consequences §     Senseless, reckless deeds §     Wastefulness §     Exhaustion §     Prodigality §     *definition of drunkenness from Greek dictionary	§     Self-controlled Life §     Balanced Life
§     Gives meaning, courage, vulnerability BY: §     Depressing awareness of reality §     Narrowing your vision of the big picture	§     Life of Tremendous Stimulation §     Spirit gives meaning and courage BY: §     Simulating awareness, §     Expanding vision to a bigger reality that there is a sovereign Lord of history §     The Word of truth
§     Effect wears off	§     Life of Steady Joy §     Filling of Holy Spirit can be ongoing §     Singing, making music in your heart §     Giving thanks in everything

o   It doesn’t have to be drunkenness we are using to “get away” from the unpleasantness of life…What could be some other things we turn to instead of the Spirit? could be food, books, shopping, etc..

o   Emphasize passive nature, we need to let God fill us.

o   Share thoughts on verses about Spirit on p.103-104

·      Make list of relationships mentioned in the passage

o   Christ/Church

o   Members of the body with each other

o   Wives/Husbands

o   Parents/Children

o   Slaves/Masters

·      What are the verbs (action words) that we see in the passage for godly relationships? Get in groups. Give out sticky notes…write one verb on each sticky note. Assign verses to each group.   Then post sticky notes when done.

o   Be subject, love, sanctify, cleansed, wash, present, nourish, cherish, respect, obey, honor, do not provoke, render service, give up threatening, doing will of God

o   Discuss overall theme of these verbs.  Basically “being subject”

§  Discuss word study for “be subject” p.102

·      Relationship 1: Wives and Husbands

o   Get in two groups…one group look at how the wife should act and her motivation…one group look at how the husband should act and his motivation (Make lists, use p.116 to help). Share together.

o   Share any thoughts from word studies, questions from 106-109.

§  Ultimately marriage is a covenant that God uses to make both men and women more like Christ.

§  More unity theme!! With each individual doing his part (5:33 and 4:16)

o   Application:  How is this going to change how we act within our marriages?  This is so hard!

o   Pray!!!

·      Relationship 2: Parents and Children

o   Look at word studies of “obey”, instruction, and discipline. p. 111 What do we learn?

o   Any insights from the Proverbs verses? P.112

·      Relationship 3: Slaves and Masters

o   How can this possibly apply to us today?

o   Make list on board of Points and Motives # 5a p.112

o   Look at word study for “eye service” and “men-pleasers”

§  What impacted you about studying this, where in your life do you need to make adjustments to your serving attitude?

o   How is a master (Leader) also responsible based on what you studied on p.114-115?

§  Do you need to make any changes in areas where you lead?

·      Share prayer requests and pray in small groups.

Lesson 8: The New You- Walking in His Love and Light

After doing the lesson, I decided to try and assimilate the information a little more thoroughly, as it felt like quite a lot of material to process. As I diagrammed the text, I began to see three categories woven into the text. I found these three categories to be very helpful in processing the information, and I hope you will as well. Speech, Behavior toward one another and Private life (or mind). Listed below are the charts we wrote out in class. The blue words are the Strongs and Vines descriptions.

SPEECH

OLD SELF

Talking filthy (5:4) Obscenity

Silly talk (5:4) Foolish

Coarse Jesting (5:4) Grossly or obscenely abusive; vulgar or indecent speech

Unwholesome words (4:29) Literal: rotten, putrid  Figurative: corrupt, foul

Speak whenever/ whatever (4:29)

Falsehood (4:25)

Lying  (4:25; Col.3:9)

New Self

Guard your mouth (4:29)

Only edifying and gracious speech, at appropriate times (4:29)

Gives grace to the hearers (4:29) Affords joy, pleasure, delight, sweetness, charm, loveliness

No lies (4:25; Col.3:9)

Speak (holding to or walking in) truth each one of you with his neighbor

Don’t talk about lewd behavior (5:4)

Giving thanks. (5:4) V: to give freely; gratitude

Not deceived by empty words (5:6) Empty: devoid of truth

BEHAVIOR TOWARD ONE ANOTHER

Old Self

Callous (4:19,32) Cease to feel pain or grief; apathetic

Sensuality (4:19) Unbridled Lust

Lusts of deceit (4:22) 

Immorality (5:3,5) Illicit sex; idol worship

Impurity (5:3,5) Unclean thoughts & life

Greed (5:3)

Coarse Jesting (5:4)

Covetous  = idolater (5:5)

Angry with sin (4:26)

Holds a grudge (4:26)

Gives the devil (means slanderer) an opportunity (4:27)

Thief (4:28)

Lazy (4:28)

Selfish (4:28)

Anger (4:31) Agitation of the soul, violent emotion exhibiting punishment

Wrath (4:31) Outburst of the moment; passionate anger, heat, boiling anger that subsides and comes up again (like a                            rolling boil)

Bitterness (4:31) Bitter root, hatred. Aristotle describes it as “the resentful spirit that refuses reconciliation”

Clamor  Outcry: imitating a raven's cry

Slander Speech damaging another's name

Malice (4:31) Ill will, desire to injure

Unkind (4:32)

Unforgiving (4:32)

New Self

Be imitators of God, as beloved children (5:1)

Self-sacrificing (5:1) Gave up self

Steal no longer (4:28)

Hard-worker (4:28) Labor even to the point of exhaustion

Share with those in need.

Angry without sin (4:26)

Does not hold a grudge (4:26)

Do not give the devil an opportunity (4:27)

Put away from bitterness, wrath, anger and malice from you (4:31)

Kind to one another (4:32) Pleasant, benevolent

Tender-hearted to one another Compassionate

Forgive each other like Christ (4:32)

PRIVATE LIFE (MIND)

Old Self            

Futile mind (4:17)

Darkened understanding (4:18)                

Excluded from the life of God (4:18)

Ignorant (4:18)

Callous (4:19)

Full of sensuality (4:19) Sexual excess and lack of restraint

Corrupted with lusts of deceit (4:22) Craving Deceit

Immoral (5:3,5)

Impure (5:3,5)

Greedy (5:3)

Bitter (4:31)

Full of wrath (4:31)

Participates in deeds of Darkness (5:8,11) in secret (5:12)

Deceived by empty words (5:6) Void of truth, indicates hollowness of something or someone

Grieve the Holy Spirit of God (4:30)

Living to sin (Rom. 6:2)

Enslaved to sin (Rom. 6:6)

New Self

Be renewed in the spirit of your mind (4:23)

Lay aside old self (4:22; Col. 3:9)

Put on new self (4:24; Col. 3:9)

·       Created in the likeness of  God

·       Created in righteousness

·       Created in the holiness of the truth

Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by who you were sealed for the day of redemption (4:30)

Dead to sin (Rom. 6:2,11)

Walk in newness of life (Rom.6:4) V: Life of a new quality

Free from sin (Rom. 6:6-7) 

Alive to God in Christ Jesus (Rom. 6:11)

Renewed in knowledge after the image of it’s Creator (Col.3:10)

In preparing for this lesson, a quote that I read that has really stuck with me was this, "Jesus isn't merely added to our old life - He becomes our new life." The old man really is filled with lies and enslavement to sin, but the new man is filled with truth and is set free from sin with his mind renewed.

Lesson 7b: Network Spiritual Gifts Assessment

Thanks to Lucia for taking notes during Kim's teaching! Below are the basics of what we talked about in class, but feel free to email Kim or Mel if you have more questions.

Scripture: 1 Peter 4:11 & Eph. 4:11-12

Question: According to the scriptures above, what are the reasons that we serve?

·      God be praised/glorified

·      Equipping of the saints to build up the body

Servant Profile

Spiritual Gifts	What you do best	COMPETENT
Personal Style	How you best serve	CONFIDENT
Ministry Passion	Where you best serve	MOTIVATED

Break into groups:

~share your primary gift and share a caution regarding your primary gift

Servant vs. Servility

	Servanthood with love	Servility with love
Serves out of…	Desire “I want to…”	Obligation “I have to…”
Motivated by	What God sees “audience of one”	What others see “to please others”
Has attitude of	Whatever it takes, “go beyond expectations”	It’s not my job, “doing the minimum”
Results are	God glorifying	Self seeking

Personal Style Checks:

Scripture: Psalm 139:13-16

~God has knit us together the way He wants us to be.

Pg. 108 (handout)

~answer questions 1-7 on page 108-109 and come up with total and graph it on page 111

People vs Task oriented defined: (Both unstructured and structured value being organized)

Unstructured –put into piles 

Structured –put into files

Task Unstructured – general guidelines, versatile

Task Structured – get job done, focus on results

People Unstructured – very conversational, flexible

People Structured – project warmth, relates well with others

Ministry Passion – feelings or desires that motivate you to serve in a particular ministry.

Scripture: Phil 2:3 & Psalm 37:3-4

Ministry Passion Assessment (packet page 125)

~work on pages 124-127

Break into groups and discuss page 136 and help others see where they can plug into the body of Christ.

Lesson 7: Growing Up –Just Like Jesus

Day One: Gifts

After your prayer, what is your summary of Ephesians 4:7-16?

The gifts given to each individual in the body <contrasts with> we are all together one

Gifts #1431: dorea

There are different words used for gifts in Ephesians 7-8.

Gifts #1390: doma

When were gifts given to men?

4:8- when He ascended on high

What did you learn about the giving of gifts from these cross-references?

John 7:37-39

The Holy Spirit had not yet been given because Jesus was not yet glorified

I Corinthians 12:4-11

There are varieties of gifts, service and activities: but the same God who empowers them all

The manifestation of the Spirit (wisdom, knowledge, faith, etc.) is given to each for the good of the Body

I also looked at Romans 12:6

Gifts that differ according to the grace given to us

Day Two: Ephesians 4:9-10

What did you learn about Jesus from these verses?

Ø  He ascended

Ø  He descended into the lower parts of the earth

Ø  He ascended far about all the heavens

Ø  He ascended, so that He might fill all things

Scripture helps interpret Scripture. Let’s look at some other passages to see if they help us better understand these two verses…

Psalm 68:1-18

Who?  The Lord        & Host of captives

What? Ascended on high     & received gifts among men

Why?  That the Lord God may dwell there

Acts 2:22-36

God raised Jesus Christ up from death

I Peter 3:18-22

Put to death in the flesh/ alive in the spirit

He went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, because they formerly did not obey [rebellious?]

Now in Heaven at the right hand of God

What does the Bible teach about Hades?

Matthew 16:18

The gates of Hell shall not win against the church!

Luke 16:23

In torment

Can see Abraham’s bosom at a distance

Revelation 1:18

Christ has the keys of Death and Hades, because He died and is alive forevermore

Revelation 20:13-14

Those who are dead and in Hades will be judged individually, according to what they have done. After judgment, death and Hades will be thrown into the lake of fire, the second death.

What is your explanation of Ephesians 4:9-10?

We admitted in class that this is a very difficult passage to dissect. If you read the King James Version, it says that "He led captivity captive". Several ladies thought this referred to the idea that Christ has captured and conquered death and sin. Death no longer has power over us, because Christ has conquered death. It is easy to picture a post-war parade in this verse, with Christ leading those He has captured through the streets, proclaiming His victory over them.

Day Three: Ephesians 4:11-13

We will be looking at spiritual gifts a little more closely, as we veer from our Precept study to learn from Network. (Check your email for next week's homework!)

Meanwhile, here is a list of various spiritual gifts mentioned throughout Scripture (see board on left):

Apostles#652: apostolos

Prophets#4396: prophetes

Evangelists#2099: euaggelistes

Pastors#4166: poimen

Teachers#1320: didaskalos

If pastors and teachers refer to one gift, what does this tell you about the responsibility of this person?

They are to guide, teach, tend and heal. This is a huge and heavy responsibility!

            A shepherd in the Near East was responsible for watching out for enemies trying to attack the sheep, defending the sheep from attackers, healing the wounded and sick sheep, finding and saving lost or trapped sheep and sharing their lives and earning their trust.

Day Four: Word Study Day

Equipping#2677: katartismos

Mature#5046: teleios

Trickery#2940: kybeia

Working #1753:energia

Fitted#4883: synarmidogeo

Held together #4822: symbibazo

What purpose do these gifted men serve in the body of Christ? How does the proper exercise of the gifts mentioned in Ephesians 4:11 affect the body of Christ?  

The gifts are for:

          1.     the equipping of the saints for the work   of service

          2.     building up the body of Christ

                 a.     attain unity of the faith

                 b.     knowledge of the Son of God

                 c.      maturity

               d.     the measure of the stature which        belongs to the fullness of Christ

As a result:

1.     we are no longer to be children (4:14)

       a.     tossed here and there by the waves

       b.     carried about by ever wind of doctrine

       c.     carried about by the trickery of men

       d.     carried about by craftiness in deceitful scheming

2.     we ARE to be speaking the truth in love

3.     we ARE to grow up in ALL aspects into Christ (4:15)

4.   we have unity of the faith (4:13)

5.   we have proper working of the body (4:16)

6.   we have the growth of the body (4:16)

7.   the body is building itself in love (4:16)

When looking at the photo of the board above, the words in red (in the middle) are also the litmus test of whether the gift being practiced is truly of God or of self. That's something to think about!

Day Five

What were the main points of Ephesians 4:7-16?

Ø  Building up of the body of Christ

Ø  unity

Ø  maturity

Ø  sanctification

From the context, what does “speaking the truth in love” mean?

We should be speaking proper doctrine – lovingly – to one another: not spouting the doctrine of the month.

From Ephesians 4:7-16 and Colossians 2:19, what causes growth of the body?

4:15    Hold fast to the Head- Christ

Growth is caused by:

1.     gifts that equip

2.     service that builds

3.     unity of the faith

4.     knowledge of the Son of God

5.     true doctrine

6.     each individual working together for the body

*Note: It is GOD who does all of the above- not us!

  Notice the progression from small -> large in Eph 4:11-13 and Jesus’ Commission to the disciples in Acts 1:7-8. Interesting parallel.  Can you think of other things that parallel this in scripture?  What implications does this have for our lives?

Eph                                                    Acts

Individual gifts (me)                   Jerusalem                            small

|                                                         Judea                                      |

|                                                         Samaria                                 |

Corporate benefit(us)                Ends of the earth              large

Homework: 

o       Do the Spiritual Gifts Assessment starting on p. 53.

o       Do the Reference Assessment starting on p. 72.

o       Next week we will be focusing on our unique spiritual gifts and how they work with the passions God gives us and with our personalities to see how we can be used to build up the church, His body.  Please bring your results with you!

o       We will discuss Lesson 8 in two weeks.  Please don’t leave it till the second week as we planned extra time to do Lesson 8 as it has some longer days.